The recent dud that was "Glitter" was
a further illustration that a top
selling singer is not guaranteed to
draw fans to the box office and the
damage done to Mariah Carrey’s career
by the film is still occurring. Even a
star such as Madonna has had more than
her share of box office failures
ranging from "Shanghai Surprise" to
"Body of Evidence" illustrating the
challenge of even established stars
taking the plunge into acting.
Not
one to be left out, MTV and Paramount
have decided to take the queen of
bubblegum pop, Britney Spears and
place her in a starring vehicle called
"Crossroads". Spears stars as Lucy, a
valedictorian who has started to
question her life free of fun and
adventure while studying to impress
her father Joe (Dan Akroyd). Joe works
as a mechanic and plans to send Lucy
to medical school as he sees a bright
future for his daughter. Before long,
Lucy and her friends Kit (Zoe Saldana)
and Mimi (Taryn Danning) are in an
effort to get to a record company
audition and a visit to Lucy’s long
lost mother (Kim Cattrall). If you are
having a hard time seeing the
connection, join the club. Lucy just
decides to leave everything behind on
a whim to travel with her two friends,
whom have grown apart from her in
recent years. The pregnant Mimi plans
to get a record deal and make
something of her life and Kit wants to
visit her fiancé who attends school in
Los Angeles. As if this scenario is
not bizarre enough, the girls are
being driven by a loner named Ben
(Anson Mount), who is rumored to be an
ex con. If you think this plot summary
is a mess, than congratulations, you
have figured out the movie and saved
yourself time and money.
The film plays out as one long
music video and is sure to delight all
of Spear’s fans who are under the age
of 16 and do not know enough to see
garbage when they see it. Spears is an
attractive lady and a talented
performer, but she is given little to
do than play herself and her acting
ability seems limited to turn, smile,
sing, look wistful and playful. I have
seen greater range from an air rifle,
and to be honest, her acting in the
Pepsi commercials is better than this
mess. One has to wonder just what
entices talent like Cattrall and
Akroyd to appear in a piece of fluff
like this. They surely can’t need the
money this badly to be reduced to
characters in brief and uninspired
supporting roles.
The dialogue in the film is
terrible at times and the audience at
the test screeners laughed at several
scenes and lines where no comedy was
intended. Worse yet, several people at
the completion of the film have said
that they have not seen a worse movie
in years. Criticism is often easier
than construction, so I will endeavor
to explain why the film failed. First,
the story and characters are very
bland and uninspired. The story is a
mix of several stock plot lines and
one can see the outcome of scenes and
characters far in advance. The
characters are bland and are not
capable of gaining support or sympathy
from the audience. There are gigantic
lapses in reasons and logic such as
the girls being able to raise large
sums of money from an impromptu
karaoke concert of "I Love Rock and
Roll".
I could go on and on about the lack
of chemistry, the bland characters and
other issues, but suffice it to say,
there is very little to redeem this
film. My advice is for Britney to
stick to what she does best; singing
and leave the acting to professionals
until she has more time to devote to
the craft and not see filming as
something to squeeze in between
touring and commercial shoots as she
did for this film.
1 star out of 5